So today, I received two conflicting pieces of advice.
The first person, a good friend and one of my best cheerleaders in this journey (of the few who even know about it), asked me why I was still counting days; “You’re beyond that!” “Counting days keeps you attached to your past, you need to move on!”
I found myself bristling a bit and defending my need to watch the days add up.
Then later today, in a private FB group I shared my desire to get a tattoo after a year to commemorate the life change of sobriety and all that it’s meant for me.
The advice I received there basically amounted to “Don’t ever count your chickens, ever.” This person had been sober 9 years and fell off the wagon. I found myself getting defensive there as well, and then quieted myself down before responding with gratitude.
I find I agree more with the second piece of advice than the first – although at some point I’ll probably count months more than days, or maybe give up counting all together – but that will need to happen naturally. I still need the crutch right now.
But regardless of whether I agree or not, I’m learning to be quiet, slow to react, and sometimes – just listen. Others have wisdom to share, if I can get out of my own way.
Today, I’m grateful for Sisters. My own, wonderful sister by blood whom I love dearly. My Sisters-in-law, who I am connecting with over the years, all of them deeply feeling, strong, intelligent women who enrich my life. And my Sister friends, those few golden friendships I’ve made over the years, who remain close in spite of distance and time.