Snow Day Wednesday
Well, nothing like trying to multi-task on a Snow Day. It started with rain, so school cancellations felt ridiculous. Right around when they would have been letting out, the snow started in earnest, so I guess maybe it was warranted in the end. But it left all of us working parents in a frenzy of figuring out Plan B which is always fun.
Thanks to our neighbor & friend, I was able to get work done while boys were happily playing with her downstairs. Right now, I’m juggling full-time agency work while also creating and managing a number of websites, a job I didn’t intend to get myself into but that’s life.
The only alcohol-related thoughts today have been regarding C’s drinking and how it affects our relationship. And whether he would ever quit. And how I might approach the conversation with him (or if I even should), and then I start to go down a familiar negative mental pathway, despairing about our lack of connection and time to have the more serious conversations about us, our kids, our future, when we can barely manage to find a way to talk about the upcoming weekend and who will be paying the daycare bill this time.
Sigh.
I think this is just Life right now. And whenever I feel myself slipping down those mental roads, I need to stop and think – “What do I have the power to do to make myself happy or to change a situation?” Not “Why isn’t this or that working out the way I would like?” or “Why isn’t some other person making me happy?”
Because that’s all I can do. And that will always need to be enough.
Gratitude Postscript
I’m grateful I was able to chip away at a number of things today in spite of the weather’s wrench in plans. I’m grateful the boys played happily with J, that they love her so much. I’m grateful for the great workout I got in last night leaving me sore today. And I’m grateful that it’s only 8:30pm and I’m pretty much done for the day. Headed down to spend a few minutes with C before he heads to bed. Some conversation is always better than none, right?