Day 196


I don’t want to Adult tonight.

Just plain don’t.

I have freelance, the challenge workout, and a number of chores that could/should be done tonight, but NO. I want to go downstairs, smoke pot, and bum out on the couch with C.

We had a full day with the boys, one of whom didn’t nap (hence the leftover freelance) and then straight into a 4-hour double-header kids birthday party at a friend’s house, filled with 3-6yos and lots and lots of sugar.

As soon as we got in the door, we were offered a drink “Wine? beer? sangria – white or red? gin & vermouth?” and grateful parents were enjoying the offer in the sunlit downstairs and outdoor deck while the kids ran around like banshees. I will admit, the chilled chardonnay did look tempting. But I held out until the N/A drinks finally appeared.

No judgment at all – in the past, I would have welcomed this chance to hang out and drink with friends, taking the crazy of the kids down a notch with a few glasses of wine. In fact, I could just picture it – catching a buzz in the sunlight, feeling warm inside & out, making stupid, awkward comments (for some reason, alcohol never improved my social skills) and eventually, needing to find the boys’ discarded sneakers and strewn-about party favors, while corralling two very tired, hungry, sugar-high kids out the door and into the car – a feat that is hard enough sober, let alone with a buzz on. 

The sunlit warm glowy buzz sounds nice. But the “get over here NOW” chasing boys around the downstairs, sticky, headachy, tired buzz absolutely does NOT.

Anyway, enough adulting. I don’t give up on my to-do list items often, but tonight, I’m cutting myself a major break.

I’m grateful for the gorgeous sunny 80-degree day we had, for the yoga alignment class this morning that hit the spot, and for some wonderful moments with the boys in spite of their usual ups-and-downs. I feel like I handled today well.