Day 24


I’m just realizing I didn’t post today, and it’s almost midnight so this will be a quick one. It was a busy day but I had a great therapy session, and also reached into my growing network of sober online groups for wisdom about having a relationship with someone who drinks heavily, while you are trying to quit.

In a nutshell, the advice was:

  • You can’t change another person, just focus on yourself
  • Take care of yourself, make yourself happy first and foremost
  • While they may try to change you back, don’t worry about their moods and reactions – that is a reflection of their own struggles, not yours
  • A deep, meaningful relationship is not possible when one or both people are drinking
  • Regardless of how “high-functioning” he is, heavy drinking is a sign of bigger issues that will remain unsolved as long as the person is drinking
  • So just work on your own issues – that’s more than enough to handle

Work on my happiness, work on my issues, and keep on keepin’ on. Sounds like a good plan.

In case anyone is reading/for my own future reference, here are some links to groups and info that have helped me today:

Living Sober online community

Mrs. D is Going Without blog

Soberful Facebook group (private)

Veronica Valli’s free e-book