Day 283

Tuesday

I should know by now – every time I put a good-willed intention out there, the Universe looks for ways to test it. 

Yesterday’s desire to carry grace forward into the day-to-day stresses of work and home life was almost immediately challenged by a sleepless night and the ongoing background strain between C and I. But I’ve been keeping my mouth shut unless I have something nice to say, and finding ways to reframe that help provide perspective. I may not be acing the marriage stuff right now, but at least I’m not actively damaging it.

In other news, today’s alcohol-free thought is brought to you by La Croix. 

As I went to the fridge to grab something to drink this afternoon and looked through the choices (multiple hoppy IPAs or cans of sparkling water), I was struck with the silly thought that I don’t have to wait to drink my favorite thirst-quencher! I can drink it whenever I want! And it felt great to say that. Why?

Well, because it’s freedom.

I’m not locked into the addiction cycle of wanting wanting wanting a drink, all day, all afternoon, looking longingly at the gin or beer or whatever and thinking “MUST. WAIT.” And then diving in as soon as it felt appropriate, to catch a buzz as soon as possible. Chasing that through the evening. Regretting the last drink or two but still feeling the compulsion to have them.

I’m free from that and I don’t miss it one iota.

Now, gotta run – I’ve a party to prepare for! A friend’s surprise 60th, and I can’t wait to enjoy it, sparkling water (or maybe something more caffeinated) in hand.